My brother is on track to get his learner’s permit soon, and if I’m being truly honest, that’s terrifying for me. I am also old enough to be the adult instructor in the car with him as he learns on the road. Also terrifying. I imagine myself in the passengers seat of my car, questioning everything with white knuckles. “Why are you changing lanes?” “Where are you going?” “Why aren’t you stopping?”
He may become a perfect driver, but this will always be the uneasiness of my heart when I’m in the passenger seat of His car. (Love you, kid!)
But why is this the state of my heart before the Lord, too? I’d like to say I’m only like this sometimes, but in all reality this is me consistently. Always questioning, always crying out for guidance.
I’ve always thought it was a good thing to be constantly on your knees asking for guidance from the Lord, but over this past year I’ve learned that it really just shows a lack of trust and steadiness in your heart toward God. Psalm 46:10 says “Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” The whole Psalm shows you what it means to be still when the world is ending — but why can’t I have this attitude in all aspects of my life.
If I can trust God when my whole world is falling apart, why can’t I trust God when my next step is a little foggy?
God calls us to be asleep in the boat when the storms are raging. Remember Jesus’ complete trust in the Lord in Matthew 8:24? He was asleep when all of the disciples were convinced they were going to die. I know how every one of these stories end (Spoiler alert: Jesus saves them), Yet I’m still a white-kuckled backseat driver with no reason to freak out.
This morning I had a gentle voice in my ear asking a simple question: When will you trust Me enough to stay quiet?